Editing to Correct Pronoun Usage

A pronoun is a word that stands in the place of a noun or another pronoun (its antecedent). The most familiar pronouns are I, me, my; we, us, our, ours; you, your, yours; he, she, it, they, their, theirs. A pronoun needs to agree with its antecedent. That means both need to have the same person (first, second, or third), the same number (singular or plural), and the same gender (masculine, feminine, neuter, or indeterminate).

Sometimes a singular pronoun replaces a word such as anybody, anyone, everybody, everyone, nobody, no one, somebody, or someone. Notice how these words are third person, singular, and indeterminate, but English has no such personal pronoun to replace it.

You can fix the problem by using alternate pronouns (her or his) or rewriting the sentence to avoid the problem.

Most pronouns change form to create possessives. A personal pronoun with an apostrophe s is a contraction, not a possessive. Make sure to use the correct form.

Editing for Subject-Verb Agreement

Subjects and verbs must agree. Follow these rules to ensure subject-verb agreement:

1. A singular subject needs a singular verb, and a plural subject needs a plural verb. Usually, plural nouns end in s, and plural verbs do not: terms have and term has. Watch for one s between the noun and verb.

   Merriam-Webster offers them as synonyms for each other, but each has a slightly different focus. (singular subjects and verbs)

   Now that both terms have shucked many of their negative connotations, they are used by people about all kinds of non-academic, non-techie subjects. (plural subjects and verbs)

2. A compound subject joined by and is always plural.

   In the days of traveling circuses, the lion tamer, trapeze artist, and tightrope walker were royalty. (plural subject and verb)

3. When a compound subject is joined by or or nor, the verb should agree with the subject closest to it.

   Neither the water boy nor the geek was considered a skilled carney. (singular final subject and verb)

4. Some indefinite pronouns are always singular (each, either, neither, one, everybody, another, anybody, everyone, nobody, everything, somebody, someone) and others are always plural (both, few, many, several).

   Everyone wants a geek to fix a computer. Few choose a jock.

5. Some indefinite pronouns (all, any, most, none, some) change depending on the object of the preposition that follows them.

   All of the sideshow acts are top notch. All of the bigtop is fireproof.

6. Don't be fooled when other nouns come between the subject and verb. Make sure the true subject and verb agree.

   A nerd, whether devoted to books or computers or sports, is a serious expert in the subject.

Editing Dialogue

One key component of an effective narrative is dialogue—the words people say. Handling dialogue can be tricky.

When two or more people are having a conversation, start a new paragraph whenever you have a new speaker:

Note that a comma separates words like said or asked from the quoted material. A period separates a complete sentence from quoted material.

When one person speaks, or the spoken words are details included in a larger idea, you can embed them in the paragraph.

Place quotation marks before and after quoted material. When periods or commas follow quoted material, always put them inside the close quotation marks. When exclamation points or question marks follow quoted material, place them inside if they punctuate the quotation and outside if they punctuate the whole sentence. Note the correct punctuation in the following dialogue.

Revising for Pace

You can't go into great depth about everything that happened over a few months' time. The essay would turn into an endless novel. Imagine Jake's journey across the Great Plains if he reported every excruciating detail.

On the other hand, you can't tell an effective story if you just gloss over everything. Imagine Jake's whole personal essay rendered that way.

You need to dive into deep detail in an important moment and then provide a quick summary of other action before diving into detail again. Focus on significant events. The trip to the library, the trip to Goodwill—these changed the writer, while mile marker 193 in Kansas did not.

Writing the Beginning

The beginning of your essay has a number of jobs:

• Catch the reader's attention
• Introduce the character (yourself)
• Describe the setting (time and place)
• Create conflict

You can click on the side notes of this excerpt to see how the sample student essay does all of these things in a compact space:

This excerpt catches the reader's attention by creating an intriguing mood. You can experiment with other opening strategies.

1. Start in the middle of the action.

   A lump in my throat, I grabbed a script and took the stage in front of a theater filled with strangers. Old strangers. How did I wind up here?

2. Use interesting dialogue.

   "If you get cast in this show, you're going to have to swear. Onstage. Loudly."

3. Pose a fascinating question.

   Do caterpillars know what they are doing when they entomb themselves in a chrysalis, or do they just figure they've finally gone crazy? I felt slightly crazy when I buried myself in two months of rehearsals for On Golden Pond.

4. Make a startling statement.

   Sometimes guts are smarter than brains.